A Message from Pastor Hale
The holy estate of marriage is holy. We are often told stories and shown images of how bad marriage can be for sinners who do not get along. It is miserable to experience and watch suffering. But implicitly blaming God’s institution of marriage in this human accounting disregards God’s holy action in uniting man and woman: They are no longer one. This holy bond is not undone by difficulties, regret, or struggling sinners.
Suffering is tough, but not evil or harmful for faith. Struggling couples should seek help – especially God’s Word of help, but sinning to avoid potential pain brings certain pain and sin. To willingly break a marriage is unholy and a direct sin against God. No amount of human motivation or rationale can undo God’s certain Word: “What God has joined together, let not man break asunder.”
No one wants a divorce – no kids grow up desiring this pain and emptiness. Feminism has not turned the script, but broadened it – so the women can leave just as easily as unbelieving men. Love is not about ourselves, but others. Love in marriage is a debt and duty to God, ultimately. It is not optional or conditional based on how much we think we should suffer. To flee from God’s call is never righteous. The holiness of marriage is a freedom for those who love Christ – it is not a constant choice or decision. Our Lord has given us who to love. The married know where to serve – and yes there will be some troubles.
Independence is an illusion. We need one another and most certainly depend on the holy God for life. Marriage is a gift of God, even where there is intense suffering and it is abused by sinful parties. Blame sinners, yes, and seek forgiveness in Christ for sin, but the one flesh union is not a mere human relationship. God unites male and female in marriage.
Leaving a marriage is to break, in a sinful way, what God has joined together. It is an unspiritual act. It is not just to break one’s word or a social contract – it is to offend and go against the holy God. That is why even for an innocent party in a divorce, who does not want the marriage to be broken, the brokenness is real. It only takes one person to break what God has joined. Marriage certainly needs our prayers and most serious attention – it is holy, after all.
Those who seek happiness in divorce are certain not to find it—since they oppose God’s will and institution of marriage. “So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matt. 19:6).